47 Random Fragments of Unauthorised Hope and Despair


TOUGH new measures from the government aim to stamp out the menace of illegal food production.

The Ministry of Safety announced that a whole range of potentially harmful substances are to be banned from shops from May 1.

These include flour, yeast and other elements used by pirates fabricating unauthorised bakery products.

Said a ministry spokesman: “These measures are purely designed to protect the health of the public.

“We would stress that this will involve no disruption to those in possession of a Food Manufacture License (FML) and they will be able to source the danger-listed products through approved wholesale outlets.

“However, it is crucial that we tackle the rising problem of unsupervised, uncertificated food production, which is often carried out in totally unsuitable, unhygienic conditions of a domestic nature.”

He said it had been clear that, despite the introduction of the licenses, large numbers of offenders had flouted the law and evaded the £5,000 annual registration fee.

Added the spokesman: “These criminals are not only putting their own families’ health at risk by their unregulated cooking activities, but are also robbing the taxpayer of millions of pounds a year.

“We are confident that our latest initiative will go a long way to rectifying this intolerable situation and reverse the alarming haemorrhaging of consumer spending from the vitally important food retail sector.”