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Issue 24 - February 2000

WELL OVER THE COP!

WHERE were you on Saturday December 18, 1999? Because this day will go down in history as the moment that many people in Worthing realised how far our society has moved towards a police state. In case you missed it, the situation was this. A small group of protesters had arrived in town to highlight their opposition to Shamrock Farm, near Henfield, a controversial holding centre for monkeys used for vivisection. Their aim was simply to get their message across to the public. But Sussex Police, for reasons which have not been explained, decided they were not going to let them get their message across and swamped Worthing with a fleet of riot vans, and at least 100 cops. First, they took it upon themselves to block a group of protesters trying to walk from the station to the town centre. Protesters were told that this was because police had reason to believe that a breach of the peace might take place, which sounds like a catch-all excuse for stopping anyone doing anything at any time they fancy. Amusingly, the police’s first attempt to surround and trap the demonstrators was foiled by a local resident, who invited the crowd to file through his side gate and escape into an adjacent road. But later on, in Christchurch Road, the police succeeded in penning in the protesters. They kept some of them there for an hour, only releasing them in groups of five from time to time. This seems to be a new police tactic. Does it ring any alarm bells that the police apparently have the right to effectively imprison someone, on the streets, without any suggestion that they have committed a crime? And what right do the police "Evidence Gatherers" have to strut around the town with their video cameras, intimidating people who have, again, broken no law and are apparently being logged by the thought police for the heinous offence of having an opinion. The more you think about it, the more you realise that the police behaviour was a perversion of both morality and democracy. Morality because you have one of the one hand a commercial company making big profits out of its involvement in the torture of small animals. And on the other hand you have concerned citizens who think this is wrong and want to hand out leaflets. Which ones deserve to be treated like criminals? Sussex Police have their view and we have ours. Democracy is also challenged by the police stance. A majority of people consider it wrong to inflict cruelty on animals. This should, in a democracy, be reason enough to allow a protest on this popular issue to go ahead without interference. In fact, this was the very reason why the police tried to stop the protest in such a heavy-handed manner. They don’t want the message to get through to a sympathetic public. They want to isolate protesters and cut off their support.

This is also the national approach to anyone who dares to challenge the status quo. The Labour Government’s new Prevention of Terrorism Bill is specifically aimed at stopping direct action - the only way to get your voice heard in our society. Under the new legislation you won’t have to plant bombs, hijack planes, murder people or even hurt anyone at all in order to be classed as a "terrorist". Instead, protesting against the destruction of the countryside will equal "terrorism", pulling up GM crops in test fields will equal "terrorism", supporting foreign groups struggling against oppressive regimes will equal "terrorism". And of course if you are a "terrorist" you can’t have the rights that you would normally enjoy as a British citizen. Police will be able to search your house, arrest you without a warrant and hold you for seven days without actually having to charge you with anything. If you think this is all wrong, you can get involved with a new local campaign group called Worthing Against the Terror Bill. This can be contacted c/o PO Box 4144, Worthing, BN14 7NZ.

SWAPPING INFORMATION

CHRISTIAN moral crusader Anthony Anthonies reports a disturbing rise in wife-swapping parties in the Worthing area. He appeals to readers for more information on this depraved activity, including details of how people actually get in touch and become involved. Mr Anthonies points out that he is himself married.

PORK-SCRATCHINGS

SAVE the Shamrock Monkeys will be addressing Worthing.eco-action’s meeting at 42 Marine Parade (above Paiges bar) on Tuesday February 1, at 7.30pm. The next meeting is on Tuesday March 7, same time, same place.
* * *
SO Worthing Borough Council is to spend £160,000 on a new hi-tech telephone switchboard at the Town Hall (Worthing Guardian, December 30). But will they hear us any better? Meanwhile, why all the fuss at the news that the council is putting business before tourism in the town (Worthing Herald, January 13)? After all, this is entirely consistent with its proven policy of always pandering to the interests of crooked business sharks and their profit lust in preference to all other considerations. That’s democracy, isn’t it?
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RESIDENTS of a village in East Sussex have declared it an independent state, free from taxation and UK "oppression", reports The Guardian (January 8). It continues: "The People’s Republic of Ashurst Wood Nation State (Prawns) has erected border posts to stop all those trying to enter without a visa. The village’s revolutionary committee has informed the Queen and the prime minister, Tony Blair, of its intention to rule unencumbered by the law of the land." Ashurst Wood’s declaration of independence reads: "We are pleased and proud to announce that we are no longer prawns of the government, we are now Prawns in our own right."
* * *
An unfortunate printing error in Worthing Council’s glossy annual review. In the back page heading "Your opinions count" the subsequent words "for shit" have unfortunately been omitted. The statement is nicely placed above a photo of Montague Place, the threat to which has revealed the council’s contempt for public opinion at its most insidious (see issue 23).
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WELL done Peter Bottomley, MP for West Worthing, for demanding a pardon for the Cambridge Two, the hostel workers absurdly handed four and five-year jail sentences because other people were dealing in drugs. In view of this, we are prepared to drop all mention of the unpleasant incident affecting his wife Virginia in the ladies’ toilets at Goring Conservative Club recently.
* * *
CONGRATS to the Worthing Party Collective for their splendid Anti-Millennium Party at the squatted house in Links Road, Worthing. We all had a porkin’ great time!

AS promised last month, we did take a trip forward 100 years in our pedal-powered Time Machine to try and bring back to you a Pork-Bolter from the future. But it was a bit more complicated than we’d anticipated. The first visit to the year 2100 netted the first publication here. But when we popped back for another look at this grim Worthing of tomorrow, we found ourselves in a completely different scenario, from which the second cutting was taken. Going for the best of three, we tried another time trip, but on this occasion found no life at all on this small part of an unrecognisable and uninhabitable planet. Basically, it would seem that there is no one future ahead of us, but a range of possibilities. Which one actually comes true is obviously going to depend on a number of factors, but, at the risk of sounding sanctimonious, it’s worth remembering that just ONE PERSON’S efforts could easily tilt the balance between disaster and salvation ...

THE PORK-BOLTER - Issue 1,024 - February 2100
Free voice of the Worthing underground resistance

ARMY ROOTS OUT VEGGIE ‘TERROR’
MORE THAN 500 WORLD BANK TROOPS WERE SENT INTO WORTHING ON DECEMBER 25 TO STAMP OUT WHAT THE AUTHORITIES CALL "BIO-TERRORISM". WE UNDERSTAND THAT THE PRESS WERE BANNED FROM RELEASING DETAILS OF THE RAIDS, AND THE NUMBERS ARRESTED, UNDER THE NEW FREEDOM of INFORMATION ACT. BUT WE HAVE LEARNT THAT MORE THAN 50 MEN, WOMEN AND CHILDREN ARE BEING HELD AT A GOVERNMENT REHABILITATION CAMP ON THE ISLE OF WIGHT. A BRIEF STATEMENT ON THE WORLD BANK WEBSITE STATED: "MEASURES TO COMBAT BIO-TERRORISM IN WORTHING, WEST SUSSEX, HAVE BEEN HAILED A SUCCESS BY THE REGIONAL HEAD OF THE FREE TRADE ENFORCEMENT UNIT, WHO CANNOT BE NAMED FOR SECURITY REASONS. THE INITIATIVE WAS FACILITATED BY A CONSCIENTIOUS JUNIOR CITIZEN WHO SUSPECTED MEMBERS OF HIS OWN FAMILY of TERRORIST ACTIVITY AND THE CRIMINAL CONSPIRACY WAS FOUND TO INVOLVE A NUMBER OF OTHER PERSONS, WHO WERE GRoWING UNREGISTERED VEGETABLES, WITHOUT THE USE oF MANDATORY PESTICIDES, AND WITHOUT PAYMENT OF PATENT FEES TO THE BIOTECH AUTHORITIES."

Pork-scratchings
AIR POLLUTION WAS WORSE IN 2099 THAN IN ANY YEAR SINCE RECORDS BEGUN, SAYS A COMMUNIQUE FROM FRIENDS oF THE EARTH, THE BANNED ENVIRONMENTAL GROUP. THE WORLD TRADE ORGANISATION CLAIMS IT IS "ON TARGET" TO REDUCE THE RATE OF INCREASE IN POLLUTION BY 0.00002% OVER THE NEXT 350 YEARS. MEANWHILE LOCAL SUPERMARKETS HAVE RUN OUT OF OXYGEN BOTTLES ON NO FEWER THAN FIVE OCCASIONS OVER THE LAST SIX MONTHS AND INFANT MORTALITY HIT NEW HIGHS FOLLOWING LAST SUMMER'S POISON CLOUD.

# # #
TRAGIC SCENES AT HOMEFIELD BUSINESS PARK, WHERE ROBO-RON, THE RECORD-BREAKING ROTARIAN ANDROID THAT HAS BEEN WORKING 24 HOURS A DAY FOR THE LAST 101 YEARS, FINALLY MET HIS MATCH. IT SEEMS THAT A LOWLY PIGEON, ON BEING INFORMED BY ROBO-RON THAt IT HAD NO AUTHORITY TO PERCH ON THE PARK’S SOLE SURVIVING TREE, DEFECATED DIRECTLY INTO HIS VENTILATION VALVE, CAUSING A SPECTACULAR SHORT-CIRCUIT AND RON’s EXPLOSIVE DEMISE .
# # #
WHILE SEAWATWER LAPS AROUND THE FRONT DOOR OF THE TOWN HALL IN CHAPEL ROAD, IT APPEARS WORTHING COUNCIL IS STILL HAVING TROUBLE GETTING HOLD OF ANY SANDBAGS. IN AN ATTEMPT TO UPDATE OURSELVES ON THE SITUATION, WE ACCESSED THE AUTHORITY'S WEBSITE, BUT FOUND IT HAD NOT BEEN UPDATED SINCE THE YEAR 1999!

The Pork-Bolter - Issue 1,024 - February 2100
News and thoughts from across Worthing’s free communities

Look behind you
AS we begin a new century, I can’t help looking back and thanking the stars that things turned out the way they did. How different things would have been if, all those years ago, people had not woken up to the urgency of the situation and had not had the courage to tackle the monster of "civilisation" head on, putting their own short-term comfort and even liberty on the line so that us lot now, and hopefully countless generations to come, can live the life that nature intended for us - breathing clean air, growing our own food, spending our days in our own way, instead of being herded into those long-gone "factories" and "offices" to waste our lives away in deluded slavery. I suppose most of all we should be grateful for fate, and in particular that once-hated symbol of the old nightmare world, McDonald’s (only the really ancient old-timers like myself even remember who they were now...). For if their foul food had not spread the contagion that wiped out millions of their customers across the globe, in an horrific, instant version of natural selection, the final collapse of the old order might not have happened in time to save the Earth from destruction! Funny the way things work out... OLD JACK, CISSBURY

Summer already?
NOW the lighter days are returning, many of us here at Highdown are already looking forward to the Summer Solstice celebrations, which it is our turn to host this year. We are fully determined NOT to leave it to the last minute this time, and have already persuaded a few of the children to start thinking about decorations NOW, rather than some time in the middle of June. We’d also like to say that just because we’re officially laying it on, please do not feel excluded from getting involved and when you’ve finished seeing to your vegetables, gathering your wood, playing your football or writing your song, why not pop over and treat us to your own brilliant ideas for this year’s festival. Cheers. STELLA, HIGHDOWN

Snow point griping about it!
BAD news, I’m afraid. Just after Yule we challenged the Chanctonbury crowd to a Grand Snowball Contest - and we lost! OK, we were slightly handicapped in numbers, but given that the opposition’s ranks included at least

NOW YOU'RE PORKING!

THE PORK-BOLTER is the one and only independent community newsletter for Worthing, established either in 1997 or some time in the late 19th century, depending on how gullible you were feeling when you saw our last issue. If you want to ensure a copy of issue 25, simply send us a stamped self-addressed envelope. To get the next six issues send a donation of at least £2 to cover costs. Copies of back issues are still available. Cheques/postal orders made payable to The Pork-Bolter. email subscriptions also available. Drop us a line: porkbolter@eco-action.org or PO Box 4144, Worthing, West Sussex, BN14 7NZ. website: http://www.eco-action.org/porkbolter

Printed and published by The Pork-Bolter, PO Box 4144, Worthing BN14 7NZ. No copyright coz information is freedom, innit?

and finally ... THINK FOR YOURSELF, IT'S NOT ILLEGAL YET!